Help for women dealing with domestic violence

(WTNH) - Monday's killings in Norwalk and Stratford are again calling attention to the problem of domestic violence. So far this year there have been 12 deaths in Connecticut linked to domestic violence. Experts say education and empowerment go a long way to saving a life.

"The first time he beat me up, I left him," said Karen Gaston, who knows all too well about domestic violence. But for her it did not stop there.

"After that I went through being stalked, being harassed, being followed, being chased."

A restraining order did not prevent her from getting stabbed by her ex-husband, but the abuse stopped after he went to prison. No longer a victim, Karen is a victim advocate at the Interval House in Hartford, which provides support, counseling and shelter for women and children.

"We tell women that they really need to protect themselves, to make sure that they have a safety plan," said Cecile Enrico, executive director of Interval House.

Enrico says women need a plan discussed in detail to save their lives. "She should have her friends be aware of what's going on if they see him."

That new found empowerment begins with picking up the phone and calling a 24 hour toll free hotline.

"When somebody calls us, we don't say you need to get a divorce or you need to leave him'" Enrico said. "We understand that they may not be ready, so they can call us just to talk."

Talking to Karen Gaston about issues such as getting a protective order could break the cycle of abuse.

"I tell the women, it works if you make it work," Gaston said. "If he calls you, even if he is trying to talk nice, document it, let the police know. You don't have to do a 911 call but just say there's a formal protective order in place. He called me but he shouldn't."

The Interval House is among a number of programs in our state to help break the cycle of domestic violence. Their statewide toll free hotline is 888-774-2900. On the web at http://intervalhousect.org/